Gurudev_Acharya_young_thumb_blu

A Fallen Soul’s Sorrow

Śrīla Bhakti Sundar Govinda Dev-Goswāmī Mahārāj’s humble poem on the appearance day of Śrīla Bhakti Rakṣak Śrīdhar Dev-Goswāmī Mahārāj.

Today, on the appearance day of our beloved Gurudev Śrīla Bhakti Sundar Govinda Dev-Goswāmī Mahārāj, we feel unable to  appreciate or glorify His Divine Grace. So, as Ganges water is used to worship the Ganges, we offer this translation of his poem honouring the appearance of his Guru Mahārāj and pray he may bestow his grace on the fallen souls.

Om Viṣṇupād Paramahaṁsa Parivrājakāchārya-varyāṣṭottara-śata-śrī
Śrīmad Bhakti Rakṣak Śrīdhar Dev-Goswāmī Mahārājer
Śubhāvirbhāva Tithite

Dīnera Ārti

A Fallen Soul’s Sorrow

on the 66th anniversary of the appearance day of
Om Viṣṇupād Paramahaṁsa Parivrājāchārya-varya Aṣṭottara-śata-śrī
Śrī Śrīmad Bhakti Rakṣak Śrīdhar Dev-Goswāmī Mahārāj

by

Śrīla Bhakti Sundar Govinda Dev-Goswāmī Mahārāj

Published in Śrī Gauḍīya Darśan,
Volume 6, Issue 3,
on Thursday, 13 October 1960.

আজি তব শুভ প্রকট-বাসরে
তব নিজজন নানা উপচারে ।
দূর দূর হতে ভেটিতে তোমারে
ব্যাকুলি ছুটিয়া আসে ॥১॥

āji tava śubha prakaṭa-vāsare
tava nija-jana nānā upachāre
dūra dūra hate bheṭite tomāre
vyākuli chhuṭiyā āse [1]

āji–Today, [on] tava–your śubha–auspicious prakaṭa–appearance vāsare–day, tava–your nija-jana–associates, [with] nānā–various upachāre–offerings, vyākuli–eagerly āse–come chhuṭiyā–streaming [in] hate–from dūra dūra–afar bheṭite–to meet tomāre–you. [1]

Today, on the auspicious day of your appearance, your associates, with various offerings, eagerly stream in from afar to meet you.

হেরি’ ও অভয় চরণ কমল
পুলকিত তনু আ̐খি ছল ছল ।
ভাব-গদ্গদ প্রেম-বিহ্বল
আপনা ধন্য বাসে ॥২॥

heri’ o abhaya charaṇa kamala
pulakita tanu ā̐khi chhala chhala
bhāva-gadgada prema-vihvala
āpanā dhanya vāse [2]

heri’–Seeing o–your kamala–lotus charaṇa–feet, [the abode of] abhaya–fearlessness, [their] tanu–bodies [are] pulakita–enraptured, [their] ā̐khi–eyes [are] chhala chhala–filled with tears, [they] gadgada–stammer bhāva–with emotion, [and,] vivhala–overwhelmed prema–with divine love, vāse–they feel āpanā–themselves [to be] dhanya–blessed. [2]

Seeing your lotus feet, the abode of fearlessness, the hair on their bodies stands on end, tears pour from their eyes, their voices falter with emotion, and, overwhelmed with divine love, they feel themselves to be blessed.

ক্ষমা-সুন্দর হে প্রভু উদার
নাহি মোর কোন পূজা-উপচার ।
যে কিছু বা আছে—পুঙ্কিল ছার
তোমার যোগ্য নয় ॥৩॥

kṣamā-sundara he prabhu udāra
nāhi mora kona pūjā-upachāra
ye kichhu vā āchhe—puṅkila chhāra
tomāra yogya naya [3]

[But] mora nāhi–I do not have kona–any upachāra–article pūjā–of worship, he–O sundara–beautiful, kṣamā–forgiving, udāra–liberal prabhu–Master! ye kichhu vā–Whatever āchhe–I have [is] puṅkila–soiled [and] chhāra–worthless. naya–It is not yogya–fit tomāra–for you. [3]

But I have no offering, O beautiful, forgiving, liberal Master! Whatever I have is soiled and worthless. It is not fit for you.

সদা জ্বলিতেছি জীবনের ভুলে
আশ্রয় মাগি তব পদমূলে ।
না পাশরি যেন তোমা কোনকালে
দাও মোরে বরাভয় ॥৪॥

sadā jvalitechhi jīvanera bhule
āśraya māgi tava pada-mūle
nā pāśari yena tomā kona-kāle
dāo more varābhaya [4]

jvalitechhi–I am suffering sadā–constantly [for my] bhule–mistakes jīvanera–in life. māgi–I pray [for] āśraya–shelter mūle–at the root [of] tava–your pada–feet. yena–May pāśari nā–I not forget tomā–you [at] kona–any kāle–time. [Please] dāo–give more–me [this] vara–boon abhaya–of fearlessness. [4]

I am constantly suffering from my life of mistakes. I pray for shelter at your feet. May I never forget you. Please give me this boon of fearlessness.

আমি মহাপাপী অধম পামর
ষড়রিপুবশে মত্ত বিভোর ।
কাম-ক্রোধ অরি ঠেলিতেছে ঘোর
মরণ-সিন্ধু-তীরে ॥৫॥

āmi mahāpāpī adhama pāmara
ṣaḍa-ripu-vaśe matta vibhora
kāma-krodha ari ṭhelitechhe ghora
maraṇa-sindhu-tīre [5]

āmi–I [am] mahāpāpī–a great sinner, adhama–a fallen pāmara–wretch. vaśe–Controlled by ṣaḍ–the six ripu–enemies, [I am] matta–bewildered [and] vibhora–overwhelmed. kāma–Lust, krodha–anger, [and my other] ghora–fearsome ari–foes ṭhelitechhe–drive [me] tīre–to the shore sindhu–of the ocean maraṇa–of death. [5]

I am a great sinner, a fallen wretch. Controlled by the six enemies, I am bewildered and overwhelmed. Lust, anger, and my other fearsome foes drive me to the shore of the ocean of death.

মন মায়ামৃগ অবশ আমার
বুঝালে বুঝে না মঙ্গল তার ।
ছুটে চলে বহি’ সংস্কার ভার
শমন-ভবন-দ্বারে ॥৬॥

mana māyāmṛga avaśa āmāra
bujhāle bujhe nā maṅgala tāra
chhuṭe chale vahi’ saṁskāra bhāra
śamana-bhavana-dvāre [6]

āmāra–My mana–mind, [like an] avaśa–uncontrollable māyā-mṛga–phantom, bujhe nā–does not understand tāra–its [own] maṅgala–good, [even when] bujhāle–I force it to understand. vahi’–Bearing bhāra–the burden saṁskāra–of [its] conditioning, chhuṭe chale–it rushes dvāre–to the door bhavana–of the house śamana–of Death. [6]

My mind, like an uncontrollable phantom, does not understand its own good even when I force it to understand. Bearing the burden of its conditioning, it rushes to the door of the house of Death.

আপনা হারায়ে মায়া-ছলনায়
লভিয়াছি সুখ-দুঃখ হেলায় ।
পুণ্য-পাপের নাগর-দোলায়
জনম-মরণ-মালা ॥৭॥

āpanā hārāye māyā-chhalanāya
labhiyāchhi sukha-duḥkha helāya
puṇya-pāpera nāgara-dolāya
janama-maraṇa-mālā [7]

hārāye–Loosing āpanā–myself [in] māyā–Māyā’s chhalanāya–deception, helāya–carelessly labhiyāchhi–I have undergone sukha–happiness [and] duḥkha–sadness nāgara-dolāya–on the ‘merry-go-round’ pāpera–of sin [and] puṇya–piety [along] mālā–the chain janama–of birth [and] maraṇa–death. [7]

Lost to myself in Māyā’s deception, I have carelessly undergone happiness and sadness on the ‘merry-go-round’ of piety and sin along the chain of birth and death.

“মহা অনর্থে” ভাবিয়া আপন
দূরে ঠেলিয়াছি পরমার্থ-ধন ।
স্বরগ-মর্ত্ত করি’ আলোড়ন
পেয়েছি দহন জ্বালা ॥৮॥

“mahā anarthe” bhāviyā āpana
dūre ṭheliyāchhi paramārtha-dhana
svaraga-marta kari’ āloḍana
peyechhi dahana jvālā [8]

bhāviyā–Immersing āpana–myself [in] “mahā–“total anarthe”–meaninglessness”, ṭheliyāchhi–I have thrown dūre–away [my] paramārtha–spiritual dhana–wealth. āloḍana kari’–Bobbing [between] svaraga–heaven [and] marta–earth, jvālā peyechhi–I have been burned dahana–by a blazing fire. [8]

Immersing myself in “total meaninglessness”, I have thrown away my spiritual wealth. Bobbing between heaven and earth, I have been burned by a blazing fire.

চারি-দিকে জ্বলে নরক-কুণ্ড
লেলিহান-শিখা আলোড়ি’ শুণ্ড ।
করিয়া ব্যাদান বিশাল তুণ্ড
গ্রাসিবারে চায় মোরে ॥৯॥

chāri-dike jvale naraka-kuṇḍa
lelihāna-śikhā āloḍi’ śuṇḍa
kariyā vyādāna viśāla tuṇḍa
grāsibāre chāya more [9]

kuṇḍa–The pit naraka–of hell jvale–blazes [in the] chāri–four dike–directions. [Its] lelihāna–shooting śikhā–flames, [with] āloḍi’–flaring śuṇḍa–trunks [and] viśāla–massive, vyādāna kariyā–gaping tuṇḍa–mouths, chāya–desire grāsibāre–to devour more–me. [9]

The pit of hell blazes on all sides. With flaring trunks and massive gaping mouths, its shooting flames desire to devour me.

ভুবন-ব্যাপ্ত-দহন-জ্বালায়
মহাত্রাসে প্রাণ ইতি-উতি ধায় ।
ক্লান্ত হইয়া আবার ঘুমায়
মহামায়া-মোহঘোরে ॥১০॥

bhuvana-vyāpta-dahana-jvālāya
mahātrāse prāṇa iti-uti dhāya
klānta ha-iyā ābāra ghumāya
mahāmāyā-moha-ghore [10]

[Within this] dahana–blazing jvālāya–fire vyāpta–spread bhuvana–throughout the world, [my] prāṇa–heart dhāya–runs iti–here [and] uti–there mahātrāse–in great fear. ha-iyā–Becoming klānta–exhausted, ābāra–again ghumāya–it falls asleep ghore–in the dark moha–illusion mahāmāyā–of Mahāmāyā. [10]

Within this blazing fire that engulfs the world, my heart runs here and there in terror. Eventually exhausted, it again falls asleep in Mahāmāyā’s dark illusion.

তব সুশীতল চরণ ছায়ায়
কত দীন হীন আশ্রয় পায় ।
এ অধম ভুলি’ মোহিনী মায়ায়
ফেলিছে দীর্ঘশ্বাস ॥১১॥

tava suśītala charaṇa chhāyāya
kata dīna hīna āśraya pāya
e adhama bhuli’ mohinī māyāya
phelichhe dīrgha-śvāsa [11]

[In the] suśītala–cooling chhāyāya–shade [of] tava–your charaṇa–feet, kata–many dīna–poor [and] hīna–fallen [souls] pāya–have found āśraya–shelter, [but] e–this adhama–fallen soul, bhuli’–blundering māyāya–in the illusion mohinī–of the enchantress, phelichhe–has [only] heaved dīrgha–long śvāsa–sighs. [11]

In the cooling shade of your feet, many poor and fallen souls have found shelter, but this fallen soul, blundering in Māyā’s illusion, has only heaved long sighs.

হরিনামামৃত সুরধুনী আনি’
কত দীন হীনে তারিলে আপনি ।
বঞ্চিত শুধু দিবস-যামিনী
এই নগণ্য-দাস ॥১২॥

hari-nāmāmṛta suradhunī āni’
kata dīna hīne tārile āpani
vañchita śudhu divasa-yāminī
ei nagaṇya-dāsa [12]

āni’–You have brought down suradhunī–the river of the gods— āmṛta–the nectar hari–of the Lord’s nāma–Name— [and] āpani–personally tārile–delivered kata–many dīna–poor [and] hīne–fallen [souls] . divasa–Day [and] yāminī–night, śudhu–only ei–this nagaṇya–insignificant dāsa–servant [remains] vañchita–deprived. [12]

You have brought down the river of heaven—the nectar of the Lord’s Name—and personally delivered many poor and fallen souls. Day and night, only this insignificant servant remains deprived.

ধর ধর প্রভু আপন স্বভাবে
তব কটাক্ষে মায়া পরাভবে ।
হে দীন-শরণ তব বৈভবে
দেখুক জগত জন ॥১৩॥

dhara dhara prabhu āpana svabhāve
tava kaṭākṣe māyā parābhave
he dīna-śaraṇa tava vaibhave
dekhuka jagata jana [13]

dhara–Grab [me!] dhara–Grab [me!] prabhu–O Master! [Out of your] āpana–own [good] svabhāve–nature. tava–Your kaṭākṣe–glance [alone] parābhave–dispels māyā–Māyā. he–O śaraṇa–shelter dīna–of the fallen! [Let] jana–the people jagata–of [this] world dekhuka–see tava–your vaibhave–glory! [13]

Grab me! Grab me! O Master! Out of your own good nature. Your glance alone dispels Māyā. O shelter of the fallen! Let the people of this world see your glory!

এ মায়া বাধন করিয়া ছেদন
তব পাদ পাই নাহি শক্তি হেন ।
তুমি কৃপা করি’ কাটিয়া আপন
শ্রীচরণে দেহ স্থান ॥১৪॥

e māyā bādhana kariyā chhedana
tava pāda pāi nāhi śakti hena
tumi kṛpā kari’ kāṭiyā āpana
śrī-charaṇe deha sthāna [14]

nāhi–I do not have hena–the śakti–power [to] chhedana kariyā–cut away e–this bādhana–bondage māyā–of Māyā [and] pāi–reach tava–your pāda–feet. [May] tumi–you [please] kṛpā kari’–be merciful, kāṭiyā–cut [it] away āpana–yourself, [and] deha–give [me] sthāna–a place [at your] śrī-charaṇe–holy feet. [14]

I do not have the power to cut away Māyā’s bondage and reach your feet. Be merciful, cut it away yourself, and give me a place at your holy feet.

মিছে বলা মোর ‘আত্ম-সমর্পণ’
আমার বলিতে নাহি কোন ধন ।
আপন করিয়া পতিত পাবন
গ্রহণ করহ মোরে ॥১৫॥

michhe balā mora ‘ātma-samarpaṇa’
āmāra balite nāhi kona dhana
āpana kariyā patita pāvana
grahaṇa karaha more [15]

mora–My balā–talk ‘ātma-samarpaṇa’–of ‘self-surrender’ [is] michhe–false. nāhi–There is no dhana–value kona–at all [in] āmāra–my balite–speech. kariyā–Make āpana–yourself pāvana–the saviour patita–of the fallen [and] grahaṇa karaha–rescue more–me. [15]

My talk of ‘self-surrender’ is false. My words have no value. Become the saviour of the fallen and rescue me.

তোমর চরণে এ মোর মিনতি
হও প্রভু মোর জীবনে গতি ।
বা̐ধিয়া পালন সেবা দিয়া নিতি
সকরুণ কৃপা-ডোরে ॥১৬॥

tomara charaṇe e mora minati
hao prabhu mora jīvane gati
bā̐dhiyā pālana sevā diyā niti
sakaruṇa kṛpā-ḍore [16]

[At] tomara–your charaṇe–feet, e–this [is] mora–my minati–prayer: hao–be, prabhu–O master, gati–the shelter [in] mora–my jīvane–life bā̐dhiyā–by binding [me] ḍore–with the ropes [of your] sakaruṇa–compassionate kṛpā–mercy [and] niti–always diyā–giving [me your] pālana–protection [and] sevā–service. [16]

At your feet, this is my prayer: O Master, be the shelter in my life by binding me with the rope of your compassionate mercy and always giving me your protection and service.

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